Saturday, August 16, 2008
He Is Good
I don't know yet what to do with this blog. I have been told that it helps to write as you deal with grief. So, for now, I will write about this journey that I never thought that I would be on. First of all, I have to thank all of my family and friends for your outpouring of love and support for our family. We are so blessed to have each of you in our lives. Please do not quit praying for us. We have heard and are learning that losing a child puts a tremendous amount of strain on a family. We want desperately to see His name lifted up through all of this. We are so weak. Pray that God does a mighty work through our lives as we go through this valley.
Yesterday, Jeff and I went to the grave. I had such mixed emotions about going there. I thought that it might be too painful and feared that, without the headstone, it would not seem special enough for my son. I kept getting angry that I was being swarmed by mosquitoes. Questions began to swirl in my mind. Couldn't God just allow us to grieve without getting bit up? I began to think about the awful labor and then the surgery/ Couldn't God have made it an easy delivery with no complications, instead of the hardest one I have ever been through? Then, why did He allow me to get pregnant just to take him away? Why does God allow my body to remind me that there is supposed to be a baby here? Couldn't He have taken care of that, too? Does He even care? Just as soon as I begin to question His love, guilt sweeps over me. How can I doubt my God's love when I have four beautiful children? How can I think that He has given me more than I can bear? I am breathing. His mercy and compassion have not failed me. He has sustained me this far and will give me the strength to get through this day. He is good. He is good.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
8 comments:
Baby Drew was just a rose too beautiful to bloom on earth. God truly understands your loss, He lost Jesus while he died for us. Just as God now has Jesus with Him in Heaven, you will also see Drew in heaven. Think of all those who have gone on before us, they are there to welcome Baby Drew and will care for him until you can see him again. God sent you misquitos to remind you that you are alive and are still entrusted to care for the precious 4 ones he gave to no one but you two. I will pray for God's comfort to ease the pain. Love in Christ, Janice Burchard (Rusty & Tina's Mom)
we love you, are are praying for you... and we won't stop
Melanie, I have thought about you so often and continue to pray for you and your family as you deal with the grief of losing precious Drew. I am so sorry and my heart breaks thinking of the hurt that you are experiencing.
I am trusting the Lord to cover you with His love and grant you the mercy you need to make it through each moment.
Much love and prayers, Faith
melanie, i am praying for you & jeff all the time. can't even imagine...
i just want to say thanks for writing these thoughts on your journey. God did something in me this morning through this... thanks.
Melanie,
I just stumbled upon your blog through a circuitous blog route, but I see you have lost your son. Although I don't know you I would like to say I am so sorry for your loss of Drew. May God give comfort and sustain you and your husband as you grieve and lean into Him, our hope.
May I point you to the blog of a young mother from our church whose baby died in her womb just as her pregnancy was completing? Her name is Molly and her daughter is Felicity. She writes of her grieving as well as other things of family life, including her husband Abraham and son Orison.
She is a good writer and maybe reading some of her blog will comfort you, knowing the companionship of others who are walking through a similar vale of tears as you.
You could start by looking at her blog here, http://thepipers.wordpress.com/
under the categories of Grief or Felicity (categories listed on the right side of the blog).
Her husband Abraham has a blog as well, http://twentytwowords.com/
He only uses 22 words in each entry. I think it is also named twenty two words as well because that is the day of the month that baby Felicity died.
David
Oh, Melanie, Melanie.
I know we've never really been so close, but God has really kept you and Jeff in my mind the last few weeks. I have thought of, and prayed for you guys so much, and even cried for you. I love that you have the strength to write about it all. God will use what you've been through. I know it. And putting your grief out there, allows others who are going through something similar to find you, and see God's hand, too. You are an amazing person, and I pray God's peace surrounds you. With love, Amanda Hueneke
Mel, Please know that you are all in our thoughts and prayers and also know that if there is ANYTHING AT ALL that we can do for any of you, just say the word!!
We will keep you all lifted in prayer and just know that God has a plan for us all. We love and miss you and are praying continually for your strength and God's mercy upon you!! All of my love to you, Jeff and the kids.... Your sister in Christ, Denise McCarthy
Thank you for sharing. Letting us into your heart and thoughts helps us know how to pray for you. I heard about your loss through your sister Hollie's blog.
Post a Comment